I really don't; not even a celebrity who has never been horrible, which Leonardo DiCaprio has.
That's a picture from today of the most recent Tweet at Leonardo DiCaprio's Twitter page.
I thought of a joke about it, but I don't want anyone to think that the joke means that I have changed my mind about marrying him or any celebrity, because I haven't, or about any conglomerate issues, because I haven't.
What kind of husband and father would he be? Would he want to videotape the birth of the children which he would convince me to have against my worries that they would be tortured all of their lives because of the SICK, SADISTIC, ILLEGAL videos of me?
I guess that would be one way to obliterate the interest that a lot of men would have in seeing those videos, or watching them again, or even continuing to think about them. Men are not known for thinking that childbirth is sexy.
"That's not how I wanted to see the rest of it."
"Not a lot of hair, though. That's good."
"Do you think he put her up to getting waxed before the birth?"
"No, she's talked about that a lot, that the reason that she had so much body hair in the videos is that they were filmed without her consent by hidden cameras in homeless shelters and psychiatric units and that she never had money then."
"I didn't know that. I thought she was just a wicked slut."
"I'm not saying she was never a wicked slut; she probably was. I'm just saying what she's said."
"Why the hell did he marry her, then?"
"Who knows?"
Silence while they watch me screaming that I just want it to be over and get that camera out of my crotch not like you ever listened before so what did I expect dammit.
"Gross."
"Yeah, the miracle of life. I don't know why people think it needs to be videotaped."
"Right; a miracle would be no blood and pain, I guess."
"Yeah, it would look better."
"Yeah."
Copyright, with noted exceptions, L. Kochman, December 22, 2015 @ 6:46 p.m.
