It is less difficult to be clear about rules and ideal behavior before there are incidents than to tell people that they made mistakes and issue severe punishments after they have made them when they didn't realize what the problems with their behavior were.
What if sports leagues for youth did these things:
-had a page at the league website that was specifically about behavior and about how to deal with situations. Everyone who was part of a team had to read a paragraph published by the league every week about hypothetical situations that can happen during practice and at games. The coach was given the electronic results every week about whether or not everyone had read the paragraph; people who hadn't read it couldn't play in the next game.
I don't think I like the idea of having multiple choice questions to answer about what the right thing to do is; I think that's coercive. The goal would be for players to think about situations before they happen, and not to dictate what their responses ought to be. If the page also clearly states what the league thinks are ideal attitudes and behaviors about sports, then the players can think about how to apply that framework of thought and behavior to situations.
-structured a few days before and after major games for discussions of what the league's ideals are for attitudes and behaviors. If you want people to move toward responsible adulthood, it helps to treat them as if they are people who have worked to achieve goals and who are capable of consciousness about their achievements. Why not treat the major games as if they conferences about the sport? Have a few hours in the morning on each of a couple of days before the game that are group discussions, with both teams together, about attitudes, behaviors, teamwork, leadership, and publicity. If the league can afford to have those discussions in places where adults have similar conferences, that might also impress the young athletes that there are rewards for authentic effort and also for maturity. The league could also pair people who play the same position at opposing teams and have other acquaintance-building activities so that the teams are thinking of each other as groups of people who love a sport and not as personal enemies. The league could have the rest of each of those days for the teams to practice.
-have a day after the game during which there are also group discussions in the morning, pertaining to what people tend to feel about winning and losing. I think it would be helpful not only for people from both teams to be acquainted before the game but also for them to know, during the game, that they will all have to talk to each other after the game. I think that would help them to think about their roles as adversaries in a game and how to responsibly fulfill those roles without trying to hurt each other physically or psychologically.
-why not also have a fun activity for everyone to do after the group discussions on the last day, whether that's everyone being given a gift card and both teams being taken to a mall for a few hours, or other activities that are fun for children and teenagers and that might help to cheer up the people who lost? I wouldn't be surprised if at least some of the people who won spent that time trying to help people from the other team feel less sad; that's when the conference organizers will know that the conference was successful.
The goal of those conferences ought to be to provide environments where people from opposing teams can have friendships.
Copyright L. Kochman, August 8, 2017 @ 9:12 a.m.
