I have a lot that I have to do. This is the week of spring break from school, but I have a lot of studying that I have to do. I'm also supposed to be starting work at school soon, which I got hired to do months ago and wasn't able to do before because I was living at the shelter and it was difficult to do all of my homework every week without working.
I have had stabbing pains, tension headaches, around my eyes since the New York Times published its interview of Ben Affleck. I don't think that anyone's romantic interest has ever caused me so much misery. Even Leonardo DiCaprio, whom I HATED almost as soon as he showed his interest in 2010, whose behavior was so disrespectful and whose attitude about his treatment of me was so self-congratulatory, who had no awareness of how offensive he was, and about whom I couldn't have a thought without being enraged, and whom I hated that much for at least 2 years in a row, didn't make me feel the way that Ben Affleck has. I don't know if that's because Mr. Affleck really doesn't know how to take NO for an answer or because there was nobody around Mr. DiCaprio for me to have to actually WORRY about, no marriage, no children of a marriage, no feeling that it wasn't just a question of doing and saying the right things for myself but also having a responsibility for not making things worse for those relationships. It never was my responsibility to try to keep that marriage together or protect those children; certainly Mr. Affleck and Ms. Garner have vindictively blamed me for the dissolution of their marriage, even though it couldn't be more obvious that they don't feel like being married and are happy to have excuses not to be that don't involve them having responsibility for their lives and decisions.
The conglomerate has taken most of my time for more than 6 years. I started this page because I wanted to say that I don't have time for death threats, and I don't want to spend time talking about the sickening decision of Mr. Affleck, Mr. Damon and Verizon to encourage stalking around the world. I have the right to try to study, to try to rest, to try to have some healthy, normal fun, without being attacked, without celebrities thinking that I'm hitting on them or that I'm encouraging them to hit on me, without having my boundaries violated and without being subjected to invasive and illegal behavior.
Copyright L. Kochman, March 17, 2016 @ 10:20 a.m.
